Lead Like a Gardener

Four Ways to Cultivate, Prune, and Lead

The very first time I had to fire someone I considered getting in a small fender-bender or having my wife push me down a small flight of stairs. Alas, I spent too much time in the planning phase and somehow ended up at my job right on time. 

The restaurant I worked at the time was in the mall food court, and one of our full-time employees had failed to show up to work on time once again. It was the final straw.  

“You have to fire him… today” my boss told me. 

Me? Today?! 

I tried to keep my cool, but I was frantic inside. 

I had of course recently expressed my desire to “grow” as a leader, which at the time I envisioned meant doing presentations on grand stages, maybe wearing a shirt and tie, and of course way less “hard work.” I had a few thoughts about how I’d open my speaking tour events, and cleared a little bit of space in my home library for a couple of awards. 

Now as soon as I got promoted, I was sending someone away. Turns out growing meant I’d now be a villain and crusher of dreams. 

A dream state hit me as I approached the employee, like I was floating in space. I had images of this poor soul begging for change outside the food court the next time I walked in, with big sad eyes while I walked past him, avoiding the piercing eye contact, fulfilling my destiny to become the ultimate business villain. 

I finally sat down, and it took no less than three tries for me to finally dribble out clear enough words: 

“You’re…fired.” 

He got up slowly and silently. The door slammed shut as he walked out. 

The next day the entrance to the food court was quiet, cold, and empty — and no one was begging for change. 

People are the Worst 

There is a joke that “people are the worst part of business.” It sure would be easy to lead if we didn’t have the messy complexity and challenges of people to deal with! 

For many leaders, people are seen as weeds in the garden of the thing you’re trying to craft and create (your business). Aggressive leaders throw down weed killer — like unforgiving policies, difficult procedures, or worse some combination of screaming and belittling that leads to firing. Passive leaders have an overrun and tangled bed of poor performers that have sucked the life out of any great production they once held to.

A quick aside: The average male elephant weighs in at 15,000 pounds. That’s skull-crushing heavy. 

Yet despite their innate power, many of these creatures can be held down with a single small rope tied to their back foot and anchored into the ground with a feeble stick. 

How? 

When the elephants are young, trainers will use chains or strong rope to ensure that the elephant is unable to move. After years of training, the adult elephants have become prisoners in their own mind, believing that they are unable to escape — when the reality is they could simply walk away. 

Like the elephant, I as a young leader had been trained to believe I had only two options: a garden scorched with weed-killer, or a tangled bed of tall weeds. As a world-class people pleaser, I always chose the tangled mess. 

The Leader and the Gardener

Author Kim Scott has called my previous belief on leading people “ruinous empathy,” where the leader is consumed more by fear of what that person in front of them feels or thinks about them to hold them accountable. 

As a young leader, I was offered a view of the world where I had to choose two options when leading people: you either have to be a complete asshole and beat people who get out of line down with your words and manipulation or you try and avoid conflict and chaos, usually muttering something to yourself about how it’ll all work out eventually. A black and white view of leadership where you’re either “mean” or “nice.” 

For the longest time I really thought leadership was getting people to follow you and accomplish what was best for the business. 

My change of mindset began with a new understanding that a business exists to bring together people with different skills and abilities they get to use to create goods and services that hopefully contribute to human and community flourishing. 

The role of the leader in this framework of business is very much like a gardener — but one who doesn’t throw down a bunch of “weed” killers. 

This leader sees their people as they see their treasured plants. In this framework, leadership is the difficult art of pruning and cultivating. 

No one enjoys being cut or dug up — until they see the fruit and flourishing on the other side. Far too many leaders however feel trapped and believe that there’s no alternatives to what they’ve been taught their whole life. Like the elephant, the ankles of their minds twinge a bit when they think about the hard work of care and accountability. 

Here’s the thing: I’ve killed more plants than I care to admit. I say that literally and figuratively. 

I’ve burned and hurt more people than I’d care to admit. I’ve surprised people who didn’t know they’d be fired, I’ve hired people who should have never been on the team, and I’ve ignored issues and allowed chaos and discord to fester on my team. 

Through it all, I’ve learned what the great gardeners — and leaders — do: 

1. The Gardener Protects. Great gardeners will put up protection that is just right for their plants, even going so far as to put young plants in a greenhouse to ensure they are ready for the harsh reality that awaits them. Great leaders know their team enough to place protections around them — this could be not promoting someone too early, 

2. The Gardener Prunes. The best gardeners will ensure there is nothing that is taking away from the health and nutrition of their plants. Sometimes that means pruning and cutting things off. Great leaders will give real and honest feedback to ensure their team members aren’t continuing in poor behavior or habits. They do whatever they can to ensure team members are at full health — even if it means pruning a full plant from the garden. 

3. The Gardener Provides. The best gardeners cultivate the soil. They lay down nutrients into the earth, and they ensure there is water and sunlight available to their plants. In the same way, the best leaders have a strong bent towards investment in their people. Whether that’s some version of leadership development, the bottom line is it’s usually simply a calming or listening presence. 

4. The Gardener is Patient. Gardeners do not see their fruit immediately. With trees for example, some plant and never get to see the greatness and triumph of the final product. Great leaders plant with a long-term mindset. They don’t give up early or easily. Yes, they have to make difficult decisions, but they are willing to wait because they know what’s possible from a single and small seed. 

The Leader’s Garden 

Can you smell that? The exquisite garden of the cultivating leader? I can just smell the spearmint, cherry, and vanilla mixed with that earthy smell of dirt and damp moss. There’s a little greenhouse behind the apple trees. The view is incredible: it’s bursting with the deep reds, wispy greens, and fluttering yellows. 

This garden is a space where conscious leaders provide intense clarity, care, and coaching to real people, all with a desire to see them utilize their gifting and abilities to better the world — even if that means a tough conversation telling them to take their skills somewhere else.